My Neck Hurts...

... and it's in no small part because of the game of 'hoofball' that went down at Ewood Park earlier today. I understand completely that Blackburn are fighting for their premier league lives, and good luck to them (more local derbies, northern dominant league and all that jazz), but the way we got dragged into their game was a little disappointing.

The bells of change rung out before the kick-off and we saw Bogdan come in to replace Jussi, who had been really quiet impressive during our last outing at Fulham so why the change came now I really can't say. Gardner, Cohen, Taylor and Rodrigo made up the midfield and when I say midfield, I mean the part of the team that spent the most time starring up into the clear, blue Lancashire skies. Rodrigo showed us all exactly why it was that he hadn't featured more this season and the only thing worse than his performance was the fact that nearly all of the people around me where calling him "Mourinho"! *

Wheater was playing at right back in the absence of Steinsson, and to be fair to him it was clearly an uncomfortable position for him, but he too was less than convincing. As for the goal, the aforementioned Mourinho gave it away cheaply around our box and the make shift defence just sort of stood off Olsen and give him an invitation to shoot, which he took... and scored.

We then spent the rest of the match looking devoid of inspiration or craft, no Sturridge to help us out this time. Davies always fails to perform against Rovers and once again he lacked control, finesse and all the other qualities that he possessed earlier in the season that meant he earned his first call up for the national squad months previously. In short, Blackburn were scrapping tooth and nail for the chance (nay, the privilege) to play us again next season, we just looked like we didn't want to break a tooth or nail so close to jetting off for the summer holidays. I fear that our season will now just fizzle out as it so often does.

There were (as Sammy Lee would say) 'positives', Ricardo Gardner for example. Although we all know by now that the centre of the pitch is not the place that does him justice, it was nice to see him back and playing for us again... oh, that's about it for the positives. Bogdan looked pretty accomplished too I suppose.

Man of the match? Well, actually I'm going to give this to Taylor. I was thinking about this earlier and of all the fringe players that have been shut out of the squad over the season, non have shown more determination to fight for a place than Matty, and seeing as the rest were sub par today, he picks up my acclaim.

*Not quiet as bad as the last time I was at Ewood Park and the guy in front of me spent the entire game screaming at a certain "John Elmander" to shift his lazy so and so.

We ❤ Muamba

The guy who sits a couple of rows behind me at the match is always on a real downer about Fabrice Muamba, and I thought, what with my new found export of opinions, that I would defend our young midfield wrecking ball.

I love watching Muamba play, he has a style that I can honestly say I have never seen the likes of in my days as a Wanderer. When he was but a rising star, striding through the Arsenal academy, people often likened him to Vieira, a commanding presence in midfield, breaker down of play and spreader of the ball (well, two out of three ain't bad). While it's true that his passing leaves the purest within us all with our head in our hands, that, quiet simply, isn't his game! I will stress this again, we are under no pretence that we have Xavi Alonso treading the turf at the Reebok, passing is just not part of the rough around the edges package that is Fabrice Muamba!

I like to envisage Muamba as like water, he flows through the game, helping out the defence and linking up with the attack, and (as apt as my metaphor is) he extinguishes the bright flames of the top clubs. I remember last season against Liverpool, it was Muamba's job to shadow Gerrard and for 80 or so minutes our defence wouldn't have been able to pick Stevie out of a line up, so little was he seen threatening (then we had to go and lose a man and Muamba's duties were split as we tried in vain to contain 11 of Liverpools pre-breakdown stars against our 10 men). He completely neutralises whichever player he is given to mark, this is a talent that is often invaluable to us when we take on the bigger clubs and also allows our midfield maestros, Holden, Davies and Lee to really shine and show off their attacking prowess and flair.

It is no small mystery why Muamba was ever present last season and was voted player of the year in his first season with us! He is quiet simply, immense. A young, English talent that (for a change) bigger clubs aren't trying to steal away from us and (at the risk of blowing his cover altogether) I would suggest that he, along with others in the Bolton mainframe, will have a big part to play in the future of English football.

So there, the guy that sits behind us! Next time you're crying into to your hot-dog at the start of the match when his name is announced in the starting 11, and next time you're pleading with Coyle to switch him for Davies after 15 minutes of the game gone, give a thought for the role he plays in the bigger picture of our style of football, our unsung hero, Fabrice Muamba.

Nothing Beats Leaving It Late

Phenomenal. With minutes left on the clock, the seldom seen Tamir Cohen puts Arsenals title hopes to bed, turns out the lights and closes the door for another year.

Before the match I'm sure I wasn't the only Wanderers fan who died a little inside when hearing that Robbo had retained his place ahead of Marcos Alonso, and the only changes to discern today's team from 'that game' a week ago was to bring back the goal machine up front and give Petrov a well earned kick up the arse by replacing him with Matty Taylor. But the men in white played the kind of football we have become so accustomed to seeing at the Reebok, artful, flowing and pacey. Colin Murray had expressed before kick off how for any reporter, Bolton against Arsenal was a golden chance to watch some real quality football, and he wasn't wrong. Danny Sturridge and Lee were a constant source of trickery and for the first half Bolton smothered Arsenal, pressing whenever they were in possession, and as a result the Gunners never really started. A half hearted appeal for a penalty from a Taylor challenge on Walcott was really the only chance they had of forging an opening in the first 45 minutes.

How we would have coped if the Vela deal had gone through and we never signed Sturridge in January I don't know (especially since Vela headed for West Brom and promptly flat lined in terms of goal threat). He is a player born to score goals, sublime or scrappy, we'll take whatever we can get but today's was certainly the latter. A corner (won from good link up play between Lee and Sturridge) whipped in for Cahill to head at goal, cleared of the line only to cross the line when Sturridge met it for his seventh goal of the season.

The second half started so well, a penalty in the first minutes, Davies with his 100% record from the spot, what could go wrong? The tamest of penalties, saved by Szczesny, then gave Arsenal momentum. It was possibly the worst thing for us, Davies seemed to spend the rest of the game lamenting the miss and Arsenal quickly went on to equalise and the Reebok had that feeling around it once again. But even Wenger's wet blankets couldn't put out a Bolton team on fire at home this season, we weathered the storm; Knight and Cahill looking immense, heading, kicking and charging down anything coming their way.

If we were going to win it, it looked like it would be from the break. Late on, the tireless front line earned the corner, cue substitute Tamir Cohen to rap up all three points. What followed was a touching and thoughtful tribute to his father and ex-Liverpool defender, the late Avi Cohen who had passed away in December of last year, taking his shirt off to reveal the tribute and picking a yellow card in the process.*

For me the man of the match has to be Zat Knight, whilst Cohen could have picked up my so widely sought after accolade for his monumental impact after such a difficult season, it was Knight who was at the heart of our 'you shall not pass' attitude that ultimately picked us up the points. Kudos.

This meant we had to throw away the consolation pizza of course (optimistic, ain't I)... luckily, we had the celebration pizza to hand.

*Aren't these rules getting ridiculous? The 'no taking your shirt off rule' was introduced to prevent players enticing the crowds, how would that get anybody riled up? Ludicrous.

Beginning At The End

Well, what better way to start up a Bolton Wanderers Blog than six games from the end of the season? To be perfectly honest it was the display at Wembley that has spurred this latest vent of my Bolton Wanderers musings, having taken the trip down south only to see the whites limp apologetically against a rampant Stoke City side I thought I might as well start up my site with a review of the performance.

Had Charlie Sheen been born a Wanderer and not the self proclaimed rock-star from Mars that he is, he might have described the Trotters as being like "droopy eyed, armless children" and far from being the nightmare that haunts every West Ham fan's dreams, we seemed to transform into a team unrecognisable from the one week before, no cutting edge, no bite, no chance. From the start it was evident that Stoke were better prepared, they were brimming with confidence and seemed at home in the magnificent Wembley stadium (a trait that the more established and recurring teams in FA Cup success enjoy), and to say that they bullied us off the ball or out muscled us would be an injustice to the impressive football the Potters unleashed. But were they 'five goals good'? No, we were 'five goals bad'.

Robbo, making the kind of mistakes we all wished were behind him after improving infinitely since the arrival of Coyle, looked like he was running with concrete boots. After gifting the first goal to Stoke he continued the game like a man desperate to make up for his mistake, only to further expose the holes in his game; namely, poor positional sense, lack of pace and a flair for the reckless challenge. From a personal point of view this hurt me like a trademark Robbo body slam, I like him, he has exactly the no-nonsense, hard hitting style that epitomised the Bolton Wanderers of years gone by, and in a changing team that has ditched the brutality for artistry I think that Robbo is a necessary link to remind us we are Bolton... not Arsenal. This is not to say that he isn't capable of the great football we all expect now, he is, a talented footballer who can link up well in attacks Robbo is a variable box of tricks. But having seen Alonso, so impressive in his last two games, I could not help but feel a little disappointed that Coyle would opt for a regular rather than a youngster in red hot form.

Anyway, the blame can't be placed on one man's shoulder, it was a team effort after all. But from the usually excellent Cahill, to the constantly inspirational captain Davies, we just didn't perform and both Cahill and Davies having perhaps their worst games of the season really took the wind out of our sails. Two more goals, Huth with a defenders volley (in off the shin) and Jones pouncing on further defensive mistakes meant that the game was over at half time. The guy sitting three rows in-front of me, apoplectic that the rest of us refused to share his belief that a Lazarus style comeback was on the cards fell to his chair like the fourth goal was a bullet through his chest and we all knew that once again the big occasion had cast an impenetrable shadow over the Wanderers.

But that team, the team that was flattened into the Wembley soil by a red and white striped bulldozer was, after all, the same team that took us to there in the first place. It would be too easy to let that one result ruin a great cup run and a fantastic season, a season that has seen Bolton shake the critics by the shoulders and make them recognise our quality, a season where two Bolton players have featured for the national team and a season that has six games left to play, and everything to play for.

Match prediction for Saturday? Bolton 3-2 winners, Sturridge continuing his hot vein of form and notching two goals and winning a penalty for Kev to convert and banish some of his Wembley demons.