Picking Up The Slack

As though to mirror this very website (that you are, so kindly, reading now) Bolton Wanderers have found themselves in a position for a fresh start. To 'pick up the slack' is a term that seems to fit the situation that Dougie Freedman has put himself in as he took charge of his first game against Cardiff City at the weekend, the idea behind the phrase refers to the tightening of a rope that has become loose as a result of lazy or inadequate pulling work on the part of the participants in what can only be assumed to be some sort of tug of war, and (as avid readers of this sparsely populated blog will come to expect) an analogy can be drawn to the footballing world of our very own Bolton Wanderers. The 'slack', in this case, being the performances of the players and the 'picker upper' of said slack is now our leader and commander, Dougie Freedman. Certainly, the ability of the squad is not a problem, players like Petrov, Mavies, Eagles and Spearing appear to have ability in abundance. Indeed, our midfield is a veritable feast of skill and creativity, so much so that the impending return of the prodigal Stuart Holden leaves many fans looking for a player that deserves to lose their place to the talented Yank. No, the ability of the squad has never been the problem, it has so far been the inconstancy and disappointing nature of the performances that have caused us to sink as low as eighteenth in a league I personally expected the team to slice through like a hot knife through butter. So Freedman, by all accounts, must be seen by Phil Gartside as a man who possesses a unique set of skills that Coyle sadly did not possess... the ability to draw the best out of the players at his disposal.
The term, 'Be All That You Can Be' was brought to the American military by a branch called the New Earth Army, who (as any of you that have read 'The Men Who Stare At Goats' are aware ) believed that humans could tap into, as before undiscovered, supernatural abilities that would give any soldier a distinct advantage over their enemy on the battle field. Now it is the job of Freedman to perform equally incredible acts of mental strength and influence his new squad to really be all that they can be. To stand up and accept the pressure that everyone is expecting promotion, everyone is expecting... more of them. Ok, a bit of a tangent I grant you, but this must be the mentality of every player from now on, and I believe that the new Scot is fully capable of rallying his troops and getting them back to the league we all know they belong (the premier league... for all you cynics)  

The weekend saw the best and worse of the old and new Bolton. The lacklustre dirge of the first half and the exciting come back of the second. A change from Coyle's old regime was immediately noticeable, the defensive formation at home, the passing wide from central positions rather than always looking for the forward pass. It was new, it was interesting, it didn't work... at least, not at first. The team looked nervous and far from thriving from 'the new manager syndrome', they looked like players all desperate not to make the first mistake and consequently never really took or even created a chance. The Cardiff opener was a ghost of the farcical defending that lead to Owen Coyle's departure, an all too familiar Zat Knight 'last minute lunge' caused an unsighted Adam Bogdan to miss what would otherwise have hopefully been a routine save for the keeper. Bolton went in at the break 1-0 down. Now, only a hand full of matches ago, fans would have taken their seats for the second half waiting like lambs for the slaughter for the inevitable collapse of Bolton in the early minutes of the second half after what can only be assumed to be a fifteen minute break of Owen Coyle regaling them of tedious stories of his latest trip down the shops (complete with slide-show presentation), such was the lethargic response to the half time team talk we had all come to expect. But, by the ruling of Freedman, no such response came... far from it. We were quick, passing the ball in the same 'left, to centre, to right' fashion as the first half, but this time with a real punch and sense of purpose. We were 1-0 down after all and this was clearly not acceptable in front of the new boss.
The real change came when an unusually ineffective Kevin Davies was replaced by David N'Gog, a player who has so far struggled to really create a groove for himself in the first team. N'Gog was almost immediately on the score sheet only to be wrongly adjudged as being offside. But this was a sign of a striker who new he had an impression to make, and was choosing to make the right one. He had one of those games, the likes of which I have not seen at the Reebok since Ivan Klasnic was (within the space of fifteen minutes or so) knocked unconscious, on the score sheet and then sent off in a dazzling display of what a player can do when they are fighting for a place in the team. N'Gog was equally busy, winning the penalty that the consistently brilliant Martin Petrov tucked away in expert fashion, scoring with a cute flick of his right foot from a driven Sam Ricketts attempt, booked for an innocuous clattering of limbs and then sent off only to be escorted off the pitch by the rapturous applause of the grateful Bolton Wanderers fans. Although unfortunately unavailable for the midweek game, the Frenchman can have done himself no harm for a real shot at first team action with his performance at the weekend.

So, like the Bolton Wanderers of the Dougie Freedman era, I too have decided to pick up the slack. In this case, the 'slack' being the lack of use of this blog... but I'm sure you already guessed that. Hopefully a documentation of the rise back to the highest heights of the premier league, I will keep on howling my football based ramblings into the dark night sky of the internet, do please feel free to join me.

The Delusions Of An Ageing Football Fan

As the Bolton squad arrive back from their holidays, freshly tanned and relaxed near to a state of presumable comatose, the training and preparations for the new season get under way. All those hours spent idly sipping Chateau Lafite on a beach in Spain come at a price, and both the hefty price tag and extra pounds gained during the process now sit uncomfortably with the players as they are thrust back into the world of rigorous training and fitness exercises. The hard work starts here, and shame on any player whose over exuberance is apparent come the start of the season.

And so I think to myself, how fit am I, really? If I was to take up the same ethic of exercise and get myself into shape for the new season, perhaps I could be on par with some of the big names we see every week! If even one of these players has lapsed over the course of their holiday, gone on a vacation of such monumental self indulgence that you could look at the man and think, "good lord, it's Paul Robinson's older, fatter brother" then surely I, a person of relative youth, could easily work to attain the same level of fitness that this player (lets call him, Paul X) will reach by the start of the new campaign. Right? RIGHT?! Surely, the chance still remains that a manager, ever desperate to build numbers in a squad run on a shoe string budget, will glance into the stands, see a young fan, kitted and ready for action and think "HIM! He is the answer to my prayers, get that lad signed up"...

Thinking about this question was a real wake up call, and it brought sharply into focus the ever diminishing possibility that I will some day become a professional football player. At the tender age of nineteen, the illusion is shattered. With the likes of Josh McEachran and Jack Wilshere already lighting up the premier league, I may as well hang up my boots, oh how I resent them! Them, and their superior footballing skills and fitness... it could have been me.

One player that I will be looking forward to watching next season however is Bolton's own Danny Ward, looking to do what I never could, and break into the first team at the age of just nineteen. Coyle will be using the pre-season tour of America to assess if he is ready to make the leap or whether another loan spell would be beneficial to help hone his skills.

And this brings us neatly into the section of my rant regarding the new look squad for next season. I've been putting off writing about the here-say and speculation over the last month or so, partly because I had other things to do and partly because it's hard to write about something that's being covered from every possible media angle and that is (in-fact) spectacularly misleading or simply untrue. But one thing we can rest assured on is that Darren Pratley is now a Wanderer, and my warmest welcome is extended to him. We'd been linked with him for a while and so, like any semi-reliable football blogger, I had been keeping an open eye on his performances with Swansea during the play-offs. I reckon it looks as though we've gone and gotten ourselves quite a player in the form of the twenty six year old midfielder. I'm sure any old clown with an internet connection has seen his impressive strike against Forest from inside his own half by now, but bare in mind that when Taylor arrived at the club we all expected to be treated to the kind of mouth watering long range efforts that he'd made his own whilst playing for Portsmouth, and we've yet really to see that magic left foot fly. The one thing I think we can expect from Pratley is a player who fits into a hole not unlike the one left by the departure of Kevin Nolan all those years ago, an incendiary bomb of energy just looking for a place to go off.

So, with my dream of being plucked from the Wednesday 6-a-side Manchester leagues, laying, in no uncertain terms, tattered on the floor, I will look hopefully on to the new season. Taking a leaf out of Kev's book I too am placing faith in our brave and fearless leader to bring about the changes and put together a team over the coming months that can really shake things up in the premier league once again... And at any rate, Andre Villas-Boas was the ripe old age of twenty one by the time he was coaching the British Virgin Isles, so time is on my side once again.

Relax, Regroup, Rebuild

The season finally drew to a close yesterday and now begins the time to look back at the season and pick the good moments from the bad. The defeat against Manchester City to make it five games lost on the bounce is certainly amongst the latter. Coyle remarked after the game that the players had been "running on empty" for the last few weeks, with a small squad this is hardly surprising and I'm sure that over the summer this is one of the areas that will be addressed. Perhaps most grateful of all for the break will be Chung-Yong Lee who will finally be able to put his feet up after more than a year of continuous football.

Despite having little left in the tank we provided an entertaining end to the season, the first half was fought evenly by both teams and but for the ball ricocheting of Joleon Lescott's face it would have ended level at half time. To cut a long and boring second half short, we ran completely out of gas, stuttered to a halt and broke down. Dzeko provided City with a second goal after some generous defending from the usual suspects at the back, Sturridge saw red late on, and there was a lap of 'appreciation' (interestingly no longer referred to as the lap of honour, I can't imagine why) that encapsulated the 'please can we just go home now' attitude that we've all been suffering for the last few weeks. As it turned out, this was the 'last chance to see' moment for the long serving Ricardo Gardner, after the semi-shock announcement that he would not be offered a new contract (but more on this later).

I was surprised to see that Elmander started the game, for some time we've known that he won't be featuring in the new look squad next season, so I found it hard to see what point there was in playing him. He was only ever going to receive a hostile reception (after all, boo's are heard louder than cheers) and this was the sort of game that I thought the youngster Vela might really benefit from getting some game time in, showing his face to the crowd and representing the youth-centric future that Coyle envisages for the club. To Elmander's credit, he went out in the manner that Bolton fans will (hopefully) remember him for; working tirelessly, selfless in a team effort and not being shy about throwing his weight around when the cause needed.

It's going to be an interesting summer, with the money that will come from the inevitable sale of Gary Cahill we will be able to invest in greater numbers for the squad, money might come in other areas too such as the sale of Ali Al-Habsi who has a taste for first team football and won't come back to sit on our bench any more. The wages freed up from Elmander will (according to Coyle) provide an opportunity to invest in younger players and the fact that Cohen has also been released (along with Samuel, Blake and Joey'O) mean that Bolton will probably become a hotspot of transfer gossip and rumours over the coming months.

During the match at the weekend I tried to count how many of that team I believed would feature for us next season, and the depressing answer was four; Jussi, Knight, Lee and Taylor. Of the team that we were able to field against the billionaires down the road, only four were (in my opinion) good enough to survive the summer... lets hope Eddie Davies has his cheque book ready. Coyle, surely will be relishing the opportunity to finally be able to put his own stamp on a team, bring in the players he wants and not have to work with the hand-me-downs from another manager (this is, after all, supposedly why he left Burnley... to pursue his aim of building a team of his own vision).

So, exciting times ahead. But with the excitement comes apprehension of knowing that we will be sailing in uncharted waters. The long standing bastions of 'Bolton Wanderers-ness' may be gone in as little as three months as players that have weathered every imaginable storm, every high and low now recognise that the end may soon be in sight for time as ever presents in this changing Bolton squad.

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It would be impossible to give the man of the match accolade to anyone other than Ricardo Gardner, an icon of Bolton Wanderers who now goes the way of Campo, Okocha, Djorkaeff, Hierro, Stelios and many other greats. I really thought he'd done enough to remain at the club for another year at least, but I suppose he now goes out on top (like van der Sar at United) and I can only wish him well and thank him for the great service and memories he has given every Bolton fan over the years.

Roll On Summertime

The short trip to Blackpool at the weekend was one of many conclusions;

1) We need a new defence

2) Our away record is woeful

3) Blackpool is the land that time left behind

Another defeat away from home and our season has well and truly burnt out, unrecognisable from the roaring flame that lit up the premier league in the lead up to December, the fire is now dwindling and in need of fresh timber to spark the blaze once again... of course, in this metaphor the "timber" is 'a fresh squad'. There's no doubt that the injury to Stuart Holden ended our season prematurely (thank you very much, Jonny Evans), and the bare bones squad that we have been fielding for the last month or so just hasn't looked good enough.

So it was always going to be a difficult game against a talented Blackpool team, who needed the win to keep their chances of survival alive. We've seen all season that with their philosophy of 'attack, attack, attack' they have caused problems for teams with even the strongest of defences, so our best chance at taking anything from the game was to try and match them, which proved to be an entertaining, although ultimately fruitless afternoon at the seaside.

We started well enough, looking positive and dominant we nicked the first goal with a rare opportunistic strike from the Captain. But on a day that Jaaskelainen may wish to forget, Blackpool quickly levelled the score, DJ Campbell lobbing the keeper who should have dealt with the threat better. Maybe this is being unnecessarily harsh on the goalkeeper who was less at fault than the right back, Steinsson didn't look particularly fit in my opinion and was run ragged by the Blackpool front line all afternoon.

The game continued in this 'back and forth' motion and we did well to equalise twice after Blackpool stepped up the pressure, knowing that a victory on home soil was vital. Taylor played well again, as did surprise package Ricardo Gardner, a man intent on getting his hands on another contract with the club. After recent injury troubles, most thought they had seen the last of the Jamaican, but these last couple of games have shown just how versatile he really is, spreading the ball around from the centre of midfield like he'd been running the show for years. I really hope that he gets that new contract, he has been a player of immense value to us over his long career as a Wanderer and to see him go would be a real shame.

The point I made to open with was that the main lingering aspects from the trip to the seaside was just what a dump Blackpool is. It's an assault on all the senses with it's intrusive tat and harsh sea wind forcing the its innumerable stenches into the nose. The town might have been abandoned in the fifties, and it's policing attitude toward the away fans reflects this. I'd never been at a game before with such an imposing and threatening police presence, it's not even as though there's any particular rivalry between the two clubs, very strange.

Anyway, final game of the season at the weekend. A Manchester City team who still need to secure that 3rd place to make sure they have an easy route to the Champions League and the recent euphoria of the FA Cup win... and us, trying to stop the rot after four consecutive defeats.

Man of the match against Blackpool? Probably give it to Kevin Davies, heard some fans coming out of the ground winging and moaning that "the big lump" up front hasn't been dropped yet. But I'm really not sure how much more he could have done against Blackpool to show he still posses a threat, a well taken goal and clever link up play with Lee and Sturridge for most of the game meant that he probably had one of his best games for a while. There might be calls over summer for a new captain to be appointed at the helm, but I think Davies can still do a job in our team.

Another Year, Another Shirt

Here it is. Reebok's latest effort.

After the initial shock of thinking, "oh my god, this is the fugliest damn shirt I've ever seen", I've sort of gained another perspective on things. At least we have the type of shirt design that lends itself to wacky and creative designs rather than the formulaic stripes that some teams have to suffer through, year after boring year.

It's a bit Star Trek-ish and unnecessarily busy, but at least it's distinctly different to anything we've had before. And who knows, maybe this will be the kit that sparks the memories of one of greatest years in the premier league history for Bolton Wanderers.

Initial responses to the design have been mixed as they usually are when a new kit is announced. This seasons was probably the most widely accepted of recent years, probably because it's quite inoffensive with nothing too crazy going on with bar-codes or anything (seriously, what was that all about?!)

As a fan I found that this seasons replica kits were a pain in the arse to wear because of how billowy the sleeves are... but that's probably to do with the fact that I'm not a professional athlete with guns to fill the sleeves in. Anyway, I'll buy it, as I have done with nearly all the others. No, the biggest problem I usually face when buying the kit is deciding the name to have on the back, and after making the fatal mistake of going for the roaring success that was Mustapha Riga three years ago, I now mainly stick to the big guns, a la Davies, Cahill and Gardner.

We're Off To The Seaside...

... But I think the players are already there. Yes, It's that time of the season again, the time when every body just wishes it would all be over and we can start again fresh. What started to seem like a magnificent season only four or five months ago, is starting to feel like we've taken one too many blows to knock us off our feet; the injuries, the recent poor form, the realisation that our squad may well be picked apart over the summer, and the FA Cup semi-final... Oh the FA Cup semi-final, how you haunt us so.

At the weekend we witnessed the epitome of 'end of season lacklustre-ness', a dreadfully slow game with a disappointing outcome, the likes of which I genuinely couldn't see coming (damn my youthful optimism).We kicked off against Sunderland and two hours later I realised only twenty minutes had passed us by, neither team could seem to carve out many chances, and of the two teams (both decimated by injuries), we looked like the only ones capable of taking a chance if one came our way. Taylor had a good chance early on but was thwarted by an impressive Mignolet, Sturridge had an uncharacteristically mediocre game that showed us all just how we will suffer when the time comes for him to show Torres where the net is, back at Chelsea. The diminutive duo Stephane Sessegnon and El Mohamady where kept quiet under the looming shadows of Cahill and Knight for most of the game and so no real goal threat came from either. No, it was Old Father Time himself that broke down our defence (after so many fouls in the Sunderland penalty box the linesman could have opened up a chicken coop), the ball was played straight down the field and although it looked off-side at the time, replays show that one of ours was actually playing him on, any guesses who...? That's right! It was, of course, Paul 'El Libero' Robinson, who then stopped and called for the off-side instead of pumping those crazy legs back to the goal to defend against Zenden who calmly rounded Jussi and slotted the ball home. One minute before half time, brilliant.

The second half started better with Gardner coming on for Muamba, our one remaining creative talent in the midfield with Mavies and Holden out, just what the doctor ordered. For a while it looked like the change had made some difference, the game was more fluid, less passes going astray and the Jamaicans influence looked to be swinging the match our way. But for Mignolet I am sure we could have taken something from the game. It took Coyle seventy five minutes to decide to bring on Klasnic, seventy five minutes to long if the stats are anything to go by (Klasnic has now scored the same amount of goals as he has had starts in the premier league, twelve), and sure enough, the goal machine did what he does best... score, obviously. The Sunderland fans were quiet, the Bolton fans woke up... just in time to see the substitute Muntari take a stroll through our defence and slide the ball across the face of goal for Knight to fumble over the line. Summing up perfectly the last couple of weeks, we left the stadium with nothing but fond anticipation of the summer break.

There is still time though, time to end the season on a high. The trip down to the seaside on Saturday will give us a huge chance to do this; to beat Blackpool, a team fighting tooth and nail to keep it's premier league hopes alive would be quite an achievement (although personally, I'd sure like to see Blackpool beat the drop, they add a bit of colour to the league, one might say).

Man of the match against Sunderland? The sponsors gave it Cahill, but there is something in me that feels the need to disagree with whatever they say, so I'll give it Taylor again, it could have been Gardner though. Taylor looked like the only one out on the pitch that didn't have his head on a sandy white beach somewhere, he seems to be playing like a man who knows his place is never safe and this suits him, it gives him the edge over Petrov in this respect and I think he genuinely enjoys the playing time.

Heurelho Gomes...

I feel so fortunate that for as long as I can remember we have never had to ask the question, "what are we going to do about that clown in goal?"

Jaaskelainen has become an icon of the premier league during the fourteen years he has been between the posts for Bolton, a symbol of consistency, reliability and unquestionable skill. He has always been regarded as one of the top, top goalkeepers in the league. But now, he's coming to a stage in his career where his position is actually under some threat, new territory for a man who has had such a firm hold on his first team status for over a decade. The dilemma that Bolton face now is a tricky one, should we gamble on a fresh young talent, or stick with the mighty Finn, what to do, what to do? Such a crisis!

... No, of course it's not. For a real goalkeeping nightmare look to Tottenham and a certain Heurelho Gomes. Seriously, how is that guy still playing for them!? He is a walking disaster zone, search YouTube for five minutes and you come away staggered by the amount of high profile mistakes from this calamitous clown. Brought to light more recently by the 'was it/wasn't it' fiasco in the Spurs - Chelsea game at the weekend where Lampard's shot was fumbled with spectacular butter-fingeredness by Gomes appearing to cross the line (when actually the whole of the ball hadn't gone over, come on guys, sort it out, technology, now! ... but I digress). They say a good goalkeeper earns his team around ten points a year, I can only imagine the kinds of things Spurs would be accomplishing if they had a goalkeeper with even some basic level of competence. And, I know, people are always telling me, "but Gomes is still one of the best shot stoppers in the league", if you had a striker who could glide through the midfield, rip apart a defence like an angry child with a wet paper bag, and round the keeper into an open net... only to spoon the ball wide from two yards out, he's a crap striker! In the same vein, Gomes is still a poor choice of goalkeeper even if he makes a string of diving, one handed saves to try and make up for his mistakes.

Defences panic when they don't know what they're going to get from a keeper, will he come out, will he stay on his line? Will he catch it, will he fumble it into his own net? But it's not just Tottenham that have problems like this, Arsenal famously struggle in the goalkeeping department (although, this Szczesny looks like he might do a decent job), and what about United! They go through phases of having world class keepers only for them to retire, leaving them with clowns like Barthez. With the announcement that Edwin Van Der Sar will be playing his last game this season, United have stepped up the hunt for an accomplished replacement once again. These are top clubs, and we, a minnow of the premier league, have never really shed any sweat on the issue. So whatever happens at Bolton in the summer, whether Jussi steps aside to make way for Bogdan, or he ups his game now that the real competition has arrived, or the tempting third prospect of Ali Al-Habsi, I rest easily knowing that the future of goalkeeping at Bolton is (at least for now) in good hands.